Married life can mean mixed up sex drives, and definite lack of sex. Whenever he’s in the mood, she isn’t. Many adult couples complain about this problem, so what exactly can you do to even the balance? What can she do when he’s in the mood and she isn’t?

Most of the time when a woman isn’t in the mood, this is code for “back the f— off”. Some men think they can sneak in a little oral, or at least something to get the job done. This does work, sometimes, but fails the majority of the time. So if she says she’s not feeling it, don’t get your hopes up.

Women, if you aren’t in the mood, don’t do the following: pretend you are asleep, pretend you are ill, say you have an important chore to do, busy yourself with anything at all, use your children to get out of sex, claim you are about to start your period, or lie in general. men are never fooled by these lies, and they will always boomerang back to hurt you in the end.

Here are some better ways to approach the situation: if you absolutely are NOT in the mood for some love making, let your husband know and ask for a “rain check” of sorts. Let him know you are distracted and aren’t really in the mood, so don’t expect mind blowing sex, but next time the two of you go at it you get to have multiple orgasms. Let him know that if he wants sex he can’t just expect it, he has to romance and seduce you. This doesn’t have to happen all of the time, but once in a while would be nice and would help to rekindle and lost flames.